unwaking

I just had one of those horrible dreams, the kind you have of real life, that could be real, that you are convinced is real. The situation is something you wanted so desperately to happen, something to make sense of your current life, and just as you were reaching the moment of understanding, the culmination of your wish, you wake up. You stumble across the floor because it is dark in your little place, you go to turn on the light and the switch is dead. You hear someone slowly approaching on the steps outside, and you think it can only be one person: he of whom you just dreamed, and you are frantically attempting to wake up and turn on a goddamn light, why won’t the light work, and what’s going on, why is he here, where has the fucking sense to my...

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Posted on 28 Mar 2003 | 1 comment

weekly wrap-up

I didn’t like this week’s Friday Five, so I’m trying out Weekly Wrap-Up: Weekly Wrap-Up #48 – Fears & Phobias: 1. What simple things scare you? Why? Walking up a flight of stairs. I am convinced that I will trip and fall and knock my front teeth out. Every single time. 2. Do you have any phobias? If so, what? I have two. One has become infamous: soured dairy products. Nothing freaks me out like milk that has passed its expiration date. It’s past a “gross-out” for me; I am truly afraid of it, like it will infect me or crawl out of the carton and become sentient or something. I am also extremely claustrophobic, but that’s not as weird. 3. What is your earliest memory of being afraid? As a child of four, I had...

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Posted on 28 Mar 2003 | Comments Off

nein! mein geliebtes bauerndorf!

No one could confuse me with a console gamer. I don’t even own a console, and have held a controller maybe, um, five times. I’m not even a PC gamer (is that the proper term?) except I did have a terrifying run-in with Quake once, in which I merely jerked the joystick in a continuous rightward direction and held the trigger down and screamed. The effect of this being, of course, my big bad manly protagonist twirling in a pretty ballerina circle while littering the universe with bullets. Until he ran out. And then he died. Therein ended my PC gaming career. Nowadays, it’s Myst III and The Sims, and neither of those require bullets or ballet moves. Thank goodness. But I do love to watch other people play games. It’s sad, really. I...

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Posted on 28 Mar 2003 | Comments Off