Ever since.

Ever since.

I don’t remember what the next word was going to be. “Ever since you wrote ‘The Bridge’…”? “Ever since I moved to Edinburgh…”? I paused over the impropriety of using only his first name in the address.

I dithered. And now it is too late: I lost my chance to tell him how much his words meant to me.

In honour of Iain (M.) Banks, Illicit Ink will present a night of paradise-themed fiction at the Bongo Club on Sunday, 7 July at 20:00. The event is called “This Side of Paradise” and I feel lucky, grateful, and more than a little terrified to be a part of it.

It’s not quite a second chance. I’ll take it.

Published by Halsted M. Bernard

An ever-molting black swan. Reader, writer, library director, over-enunciator. Listening + Unlearning. Opinions are my own. She/her. #BlackLivesMatter

6 thoughts on “Ever since.

  1. O, ‘sted.

    My first… well, my first reaction is lachrymatory. But my second reaction is: maybe you’ve been robbed of the chance to say it, but, maybe somehow he already knew. I like to hope so.

    Good luck at the event. It’ll go great.

    1. Thank you, Ned. I’m happy to report that the evening was every bit as wonderful as I hoped it would be. It was a proper kick-off to a season celebrating the life and work of an astounding human being.

  2. Can’t wait to see what you’ve written for this, ‘sted. Whatever it is, I bet Iain will be there with us in spirit (if you get a whiff of 12-year old Lagavulin going past, that’ll be him!)

  3. Oof.

    Love, he must have known of your extreme fondness for his work, because he certainly was told – and by numerous people. Of course it’s not the same. Like you conjured Robert Louis at Seance Fiction, though, you can bet he’ll be bobbing around the bar admiring the admirers on 7 July.

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